“You should never fight your feelings … ” so the song by Embrace goes. And that’s absolutely right.
It never ceases to amaze me the wisdom that comes out of seemingly vacuous pop songs.
We’ve all had a time in our lives where we have feelings we wish we didn’t have, anger, resentment, even love for somebody who has betrayed or let us down. We wish we could just switch them off and we fight them, trying to beat them into submission, and beat ourselves up by the same measure.
Feelings are there to be felt – your emotions are what you feel and there’s nothing you can do about it.
Feelings aren’t bad, they just tell you things about yourself. They remind us that we’re alive, that we are loving, caring people, or that we believe in something.
The best way to help unwanted feelings to go is firstly to accept that you have them, then to allow yourself to feel them fully, without judgement. Recognise them, let them come in, feel them fully – no matter how painful, and I promise they will pass leaving you with a feeling of peace.
I had to carry out this very exercise this morning. I was feeling sorry for myself, and decided to let myself feel it instead of berating myself for being a “weakling.”
I had a good cry, let it all out, and the feelings subsided leaving me more peaceful and able to enjoy the rest of my day.
I’ve touched on this in the past in my previous article Feeling Down? but I felt this needed repeating again, because I’m seeing a lot of people going through difficult times right now, and a little extra TLC is needed.
Mercury turned retrograde on 6th November which always brings up challenging emotions and is a time of introspection and looking at the past. That’s never easy, and can be turbulent for anyone.
So please, if you’re having a hard time, don’t make it worse for yourself by trying to repress your feelings. You can’t fight them so don’t try. Honour them for what they are, let them out and let them go. They will pass eventually.
Feelings need to be felt.
Just remember one thing – you don’t have to act on them!