Perfect Love?

Isn’t it funny how we all yearn for unconditional love when so few of us are actually willing to give it to others?

Angels love us all unconditionally. They see us for the perfect beings that we are, warts and all. They don’t care if we didn’t wash our hair, or have an annoying habit or some other trivial flaw that another person might hold against us. They know that the perfection is in the imperfection. We were all made by an infinite higher power – a power that cannot make mistakes, so how can any of us be imperfect?

Young Girl (8-10) Dressed in a Fairy Costume

It’s a contradiction that most of us don’t understand. Acceptance of how another person really is, and to love them anyway – that’s unconditional love. They don’t have to be a certain way, dress in a manner we like or do things for us to make us happy.

Sadly, in relationships, many of us look for things in people that simply aren’t there, or we project our ideals onto a loved one, building an unhealthy obsession with an unrealistic image of who we would like them to be. When we discover they aren’t as perfect as we imagined, we are left feeling disillusioned or let down.  Oh, the dangers of putting people on a pedestal!

Our love is conditional on them being a certain way, making us feel in a certain way or meeting our silly, made-up standards. Ones that we probably don’t even set for ourselves.

What has the TV done to us? Making us expect our prospective partners to be picture perfect, able to do it all, love us unconditionally  and make us happy. Is that really fair? Well in a word, no.

You see this in the work place too. I’ve always been a bit of a perfectionist, and a few years ago, I was taken to one side by my manager and admonished for expecting my colleagues to live up to my own high standards. I pointed out that I lived up to them myself, and he explained to me that my standards and just because I’d chosen them for myself, it wasn’t fair or reasonable to expect other people to be able to live up to such levels of perfection.

Expecting other people to live up to your high and exacting standards is just asking for trouble. It’s not fair to them and you’re both likely to end up feelings resentful. You because they “let you down” and them because they may feel that they never quite measure up.

You can learn to see perfection in the imperfection of others. Each of us a pure and perfect child of God. We’re all different and that’s half the fun. The key to happiness is to rejoice in the differences, in the imperfections. Don’t allow yourself to get angry at others(or yourself) for their perceived failings, love them for who they are and their own uniqueness.

Candy Hearts

Life is much less stressful when you do! Relax and lets enjoy and accept each other’s imperfections. It’ll make for a much kinder and more relaxed world.

Vive la différence!