I had one of those days today. you know the ones I mean, I woke up feeling all icky and sad, for no apparent reason. I tried to muster myself out of it but it was a no go, a dead end alley, an emotional cul-de-sac. Today just was not going to get started let alone be a go-er for getting work done!
I felt disappointed at first, and a little frustrated but I’ve learned not to allow the voice in my head to beat me up when I have these days, anymore.
We all have days when we just feel icky. I felt inexplicably sad and dysphoric with it. I don’t have an explanation, and I don’t feel the need to go trawling medical websites (which are more likely to convince me I have brain cancer and need a vasectomy or something equally ridiculous) on the internet to find out.
I feel rubbish today. And that’s OK because sometimes, the best thing to do is nothing at all.
It took me a while to get this. it’s all about self acceptance and understanding that we are human, not machines. Heck, even machines need maintenance, time to cool down or cleaning down and servicing every now and then!
That wasn’t always the case though. What I used to do when I had icky days, went something like this, you may be able to relate:
1. Beat myself up about being “lazy” or “useless”
2. Worry furiously about why I’m feeling low and try to analyse what’s “wrong” with me
3. Find no apparent reason and beat myself up some more
4. Feel worse
5. Try to do work, and end up in tears, hiding under the duvet with Evey and feeling worse
So, you know what folks? I learned to accept that sometimes, I just have off days.
We all do, and you know what? That’s ok. It’s no biggie.
I’m an entrepreneur so it was hard for me to accept that at first, after all if I don’t work, I don’t eat! My business needs me! But I realised that my business can cope with me taking a day off, and it will still be there in the morning tomorrow when I’m over my attack of the icky, feeling better and motivated, ready to take on the world again.
Fortified by the homemade vegetable soup that I took the time out to make today, I’m starting to feel human again. Back in touch with myself.
As my icky day now draws to a close, I can see blue sky appearing out of my window after a cloudy and wet day. It’s felt as if the weather were mood matching me today, it was distinctly overcast and dreary, but now as my mood lifts, so are the clouds.
So remember – icky feelings don’t last any more than cloudy weather. They may seem interminable, but just accept that sometimes there is nothing you can do, and remember the saying
“This too shall pass!”
Are you looking for guidance or answer on your path?
Lost or seeking spiritual guidance?